Envious Enigma
by dmap
Summary: Tsuzuki contracted a brain degradation illness. He learned that Muraki was the only doctor that could maybe cure him. Through a painful journey of lost and found hope, Hisoka would not give up on the only chance left, but would the doctor show some pity?
1. Chapter 1

**_T_**_**suzuki and Hisoka**_

_Complete opposites on the outside. _

_Yet, their hearts could connect in such a way that not even death could separate them. _

_I dedicate this story to all the people who still believe in true LOVE._

**Note**

This story relates to Parkinson's disease (mind deterioration). 

**Forewords**

In the world of death, one could still not escape the hardships of life.

Although he maintained his 26-year-old look from when he died, Tsuzuki was actually approaching eighty years in age. For unknown reasons, he contracted a common neurologic disease believed to be caused by destruction of the brain cells. Muscle rigidity, slow speech and movement, and weakness were only some of the symptoms Tsuzuki felt, suspected, but tried to hide. One day, his masklike facial expression hit Hisoka really hard. The chronic, progressive, nervous paralysis degenerated not only Tsuzuki himself, but more the boy that could no longer survive without his love. Together, their extensive research led them to the only doctor that could maybe cure the disorder, but Muraki thought, keeping the man alive and healthy was enough, keeping his mind clear was unnecessary.

Besides, this was his golden opportunity of stealing the mind, soul, and heart of the man that fueled his wet dreams everynight.

_ To be continued..._  



	2. Chapter 2

On a beautiful Sunday morning, under the bright orange sun, Tsuzuki and Hisoka were sitting at a library. Alone._  
_

It was Hisoka's idea who needed a quiet time for reading. Tsuzuki on the other hand, would rather go out and do something more fun. But when his young, handsome, green-eyed co-worker asked him "Can we hang out together at the library?", Tsuzuki readily agreed.

When you like someone, nothing really mattered, as long as you could spend time with them.

* * *

It's been a year since they met and partnered as guardians of death. Although they have gotten friendly and very close to each other, they somehow kept their distance too. As hard as it was to believe, Tsuzuki wished there were another encounter with Muraki, because it seemed like the only times Hisoka would express his feelings out loud was when Tsuzuki was near death. He wished he could hear Hisoka say again that they belong together.

Or could it be that the boy met someone else? He'd been out on his own quite often lately, but did not say where... And when Tsuzuki asked if he could go too, the boy often shook his head no in a polite manner. "Maybe next time, I will follow him to find out" Tsuzuki thought to himself.

_He followed the boy from behind, trying to be as quiet as possible. Then he saw him walking towards a brick house down the valley. Someone opened the door for him, it was a man. They hugged each other in what seemed not too appropriate to Tsuzuki. Then they closed the door. Tsuzuki approached the house quietly and could not see through the blinds and curtains of the windows. He walked around the brick house and found a window showing the bathroom. He was not expecting to see much, but his heartbeat rose when he realized that the man and the boy were having hot sex under a steamy shower. Why was he sexually excited at the sight?? He was supposed to be jealous! Damn!! Breathing heavily, Tsuzuki heard the man say "Soka, you're so tight, and I just have one finger inside." Tsuzuki felt his own erection growing inside the boxers and sweat rolling down his neck. "Here goes my second finger, if it hurts, tell me and I'll stop" the man assured. "No, don't stop. Please don't" the boy replied. "Enter me right now, I need you inside me, please" the boy begged shamelessly. "But this is our first time together, I don't want to hurt you... hold on just a second, I'll go get some lube" the man offered, and walked out of the shower, leaving the boy with a cruelly empty butthole. "Don't go! Tsuzuki, don't go!" the boy called out. "Come back, I want you! Tsuzuki!"_

"Tsuzuki!" Hisoka called.

"Tsuzuki!" Hisoka shook the daydreaming man.

"Tsuzuki!"

Then he awoke. No wonder he was turned on at the witness of the shower sex scene, because it was again one of those erotic dreams he had about making love to Hisoka. He hoped his erection would not be too obvious to the studious boy sitting right next to him. Their crotch were only a few inches apart. 

_I'm so sick. It's not even night time, and I'm already having those wet dreams. And on top of that, in a library! And on top top of that, in front of Hisoka! I'm such a fucking horny bastard._

"Tsuzuki, what is it?" Hisoka asked curiously.

"Nothing. Just... daydreaming."

Hisoka smiled. "Why don't you get yourself a book to read?"

"Sure." Tsuzuki gladly walked away to get a book, and on his way there, to go to the bathroom to release himself. He did not really care which book he picked, because he wasn't going to read it anyway. Or so he thought. The book cover showed the human brain. Not a very nice sight.


	3. Chapter 3

After a self-release in the bathroom, Tsuzuki wiped off, washed his hands, and zipped his fly. The bulge inside his pants had been taken good care of. He returned to Hisoka and sat not _next_ to the boy, but one chair away. It was safer like that. Also he was afraid he still smells of... huh... _never mind_.

He scanned the pages of the brain book that he carelessly grabbed a long moment ago. There were some gory pictures of the human brain, and he thought, _good thing I'm not a brain surgeon_. Several pages down, he found some mathematics on longetivity, a bunch of tables, figures, and lists of chemicals. He had never been skilled in scientific topics. He could feel Hisoka eyeing him. _Maybe I'm making too much noise_, he thought. Pretending to be interested, he picked Chapter 2 and stopped flipping pages. There were some photos of people and their loving family, cozy homes, tender pets, and he started reading at the middle of the page.

"... muscle rigidity, slow speech and movement, and weakness ..."

He skipped a few lines.

"... gradual paralysis of face, lack of facial expressions ..."

Strangely, the words pinched something inside Tsuzuki. His mind went blank for a minute. Then slowly, he turned back to page 1 of the book and started reading honestly. Later that day, when Hisoka suggested they go eat something, Tsuzuki asked if he could use the boy's account to check out the book. Smiling, the boy nodded. For a man that did not like books, his partner has indeed changed for the better.

They ate dinner at a local restaurant not too far from the library.

"What were you reading, Tsuzuki?" Hisoka asked curiously.

"Some brain book. I don't understand much, but just enough to keep reading. I'll let you know if I learn something from it, or if it makes me smarter than you." He smiled his sexy smile and winked at the boy.

Hisoka blushed. _Damn! Why is it that everytime this man uses his seductive smile and wink combo, my legs go weak. Damn him!_ The boy thought to himself. The waiter brought their meals and they ate and talked and laughed, but all the while, each could not bring himself to declare his feelings for the other. Although Tsuzuki enjoyed the dinner, there was one line from the brain book that kept him from fully savoring his caramel apple pie. He had a small bite only, so he asked the waiter to box up the left-over. Surprised, Hisoka teased, "toothache?" but the man smiled his sexy smile and said "saving it for bedtime", and winked at the boy.Hisoka blushed again. _Damn! Damn! Damn! Why is it that he keeps using his seductive smile and wink combo! Can't he just use one or the other? Why the combo? Damn! My knees are shaking. Aarrgh!!!_

* * *

The passage of the book, that kept bothering Tsuzuki, quoted "_This disease has no known cure to this day. However, treatments to slow down the nervous crash are under development (K. Muraki, Advanced Medical Research, 1999)_." 


	4. Chapter 4

They finished eating and paid their check. As they were heading out of the diner, Hisoka noticed something...

"Tsuzuki, are you okay?" He asked.

"Yeah, why?" Tsuzuki wasn't sure why the boy asked the sudden question.

"You're limping. Is your leg hurt?"

Tsuzuki did not realize he was limping. Then he remembered, many times lately, he had observed his tendency of dragging a leg. It was either legs, not one in particular.

"It's just numb. Not to worry." He hated himself for lying to Hisoka.

Somehow, almost instantly, he could walk just fine. The numb was gone in a fraction of a second.

* * *

The weather was getting colder everyday. Summer breeze had died down, autumn foliage had finished falling, and trees had gone bald. The daylight time was getter shorter. In the morning, when they went to work, the sky was always dark, and in the evening, when they left their office, the sky was even darker. One might wonder, if the sun had found a better planet to be in. Tsuzuki and Hisoka finished solving a recent case, and there were no new ones coming up. So they got to take some time off of work. 

Hisoka was sitting at home and looking out the windows. He thought of Tsuzuki. The man looked different lately. The sexy smile and wink were less frequent. At times, the man had a blank face, no grimace, no expression. Sometimes, he looked at Hisoka, but the eyes weren't _seeing_, they were _staring_ elsewhere. To Hisoka, Tsuzuki left an impression that something inside him had _died_. His talking tone was no longer playful, more serious, less confident, and just too soft. The man of steel no longer showed his mark of steel. Hisoka could feel that Tsuzuki was disturbed, but at the same time, he also felt that... Tsuzuki was calm.

If the waves of a sea could pause when they reached their top heights, then Tsuzuki would be that pausing wave.

* * *

Hisoka hesitated for a moment, and decided that it was time for a good talk with Tsuzuki. He went to the man's place and knocked at the door. When it opened, the sight he saw, the words he heard, would forever haunt him. 

"Yes, Sir? May I help you?" Tsuzuki asked the stranger at his door.

* * *

**I know the chapter is short. I've been sick lately and did not update at all. I wanted to write something today, and I've tried my best, so hang in there with me please? Thanks...**


End file.
